Do you want to care?

This is a poem
That’s right
No lighthearted intro
This wasn’t even planned.

This month
I decided
I had to write a poem
And this poem
Is the type of poem
I’d write
On yellowed college ruled paper
From last year

This poem is me
Just feeling
Not happy?

And if this was really yellowed paper
This would be the type of paper I’d tear up
And pretend I never wrote.

I’m not a person who asks a lot of deep questions
The most important one I’ve asked was
Did we have homework for science?

No.
We didn’t.

But I am the type of person to question
I know a lot of things
Am a lot of things

I have
Six different personas
And I keep track of them all

School Persona One
Only a certain group of people know me like this
Maybe this is the persona that appears on the blog the most
I’m studious
Awkward
Maybe a bit outspoken
I pretend to try to be funny
And I criticize myself before anyone else can.

School Persona Two
I’m shy
Quiet
Kind of adorable?
And now resisting the urge to type a disclaimer like (lol nope)
And here, I get to be the one who complains about a ninety three

School Persona Three
Invisible

Home Persona
Either a great kid
Or a nightmare

Stranger Persona
Respectful
Sweet
Great grades
Golden child

Little Kid Persona
Self deprecating
In the most humorous way possible
I’m one of them

And then there are the quirks
I’m surprisingly a lot of things
I’m known for disliking exercise
I’m actually quite strong
I’m ridiculously awkward
But when it comes to it
I’m quite clever
If only someone listened

Which leads me to where I began
Do you want to care?
Or are you just going to like this without reading it?
Or maybe refrain from saying anything because, quite simply, you don’t know what to say?

Whatever you do,
It’s fine by me
That’s another thing I do

I endure.

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26 thoughts on “Do you want to care?

  1. I don’t really know if what I want to say is the right thing to say, but I’m going to say it anyway? *raises hand in the air* I do want to care, Ivy. I know we don’t really know each other buuut, you’re my long lost soul twin? And even if you weren’t, I’d still care, because everybody deserves to be happy. Even on their not-happy days. So, Ivy, I care. And I’d like to help in anyway that I can. I think all of us have multiple personas, some more than others. It’s just a question of how well we integrate all of them into one personality, at the end of the day. May not be easy and some people may not ‘accept’ the real you, but I guarantee there will be people who will. They will like you for you. You don’t have stay bound in those expectations, you don’t have to endure them, love. Break free and live. Do things that make you happy, say things that make you happy. Don’t let other people stop you, if they are stopping you. Until then, all I can say is that this mood will pass and you’ll feel better soon. I hope you do! Take care, Ivy. 💕

    Liked by 1 person

    • Believe it or not, this is something similar to what I would say in a situation like this. So thank you. It really did make me feel better. and thank you again for all the great positive words and just happiness. 🙂 It matters a whole lot, so thank you.

      Liked by 1 person

      • Then you’re welcome. I’m glad my words could help, that’s all I have to offer. And a listening ear, should you need it. 🙂 I wish you all the happiness in the world, Ivy. 💕

        Liked by 1 person

  2. I LOVED THIS! I am new to blogging and have seen every few posts and this one by far has been my favorite and will probably remain so throughout my blogging experience. Even though we just met (well not really but thats not the point lol) I care, and I always will! This is amazing keep this up! I am ready to devoir more of what you has to say. Till we meet again -Tessa L.

    Liked by 1 person

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